Every night at 9:00 PM, I walk my dog, Leo, while listening to podcasts. Lately, I’ve been into Hidden Brain with Shankar Vedantam. In a recent episode, Naomi Rothman talked about how society values leaders who project certainty over ambivalence—often favoring confidence even when it’s based on incomplete or inaccurate information.
Rothman cited a study where CEOs who admitted uncertainty during earnings calls were judged more harshly and seen as less competent, even though they were being honest.
Rothman said:
Everyone wants a leader to be black and white because otherwise, they might look inauthentic if they change and are inconsistent. We think they will help us and provide us with certainty about how to act. And it's very interesting to notice that that does seem to have emerged as the prototypical model of what it looks like to be a leader.
Some leaders, however, embrace ambivalence. Instead of pretending to have all the answers, they collaborate, sitting on the same side of the table as their teams. This is especially important in complex situations where problems need teamwork to solve. In Product Management, this approach is essential. PMs don’t lead from above—they work as peers.
Rothman continues:
What we have found across three separate studies is that leaders who are ambivalent seek more information from their team members, and team members start seeking more information from each other, and the team performs better compared to when leaders experience less ambivalence.
Ambivalence in Product Management
Product managers live in a world of incomplete data, vague feedback, and teams that are already stretched thin. Decisions rarely feel certain. It’s not glamorous, but this honesty keeps PMs grounded in the truth, rather than the facade Harry Frankfurt, author of On Bullshit, describes as "confidence without understanding."
That said, PMs also have an outward-facing role where confidence and decisiveness are critical—like presenting to customers or persuading leadership teams. The difference is this confidence feels earned. It’s built by wrestling with uncertainty and understanding the problem firsthand.
It’s not bullshit; it’s sincerity—or at least that’s what I tell myself.
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Original photo by Ernst Vikne. Source: Flickr.